LESSON NOTES · レッスンノート

N5Lesson notes · Oct 3, 2026

You''re Welcome in Japanese: Why どういたしまして Is the Textbook Answer Nobody Gives

"You're welcome" in Japanese is どういたしまして, but it is stiff and rarely used between adults. In real life people say いえいえ, とんでもないです, or 気きにしないで, depending on who they are talking to.

Every textbook teaches ありがとう → どういたしまして as a matched pair, like thank you → you're welcome. Then you move to Japan, say どういたしまして after someone thanks you, and get a slightly surprised smile. The phrase is not wrong. It just belongs to a narrow set of situations. This guide shows what people say instead, and the one rule that decides it.

The basics

What is the textbook way to say "you're welcome" in Japanese?

The textbook answer is どういたしまして. It is grammatically perfect and polite, but it sounds formal and a little distant, as if you were announcing that you did a favor.

ありがとうございます。— どういたしまして。 — Thank you. — You're welcome. (textbook pair, polite) 道みちを教おしえてくれてありがとう。— どういたしまして。 — Thanks for showing me the way. — You're welcome. (fine with a stranger, a bit formal with a friend)

Where it fits naturally: a stranger you helped for a moment, a child thanking an adult, or a teacher modelling the phrase in class. Where it feels off: coworkers, friends, family, and anyone above you.

What do people actually say instead?

The most common everyday reply is いえいえ (or just いえ / いいえ). Literally it means "no, no". You are waving the thanks away, as in "oh, it was nothing".

手伝てつだってくれてありがとう。— いえいえ。 — Thanks for helping. — Oh, no, no. (polite-neutral, the real default) 資料しりょう、ありがとうございました。— いえいえ、全然ぜんぜん大丈夫だいじょうぶですよ。 — Thank you for the materials. — Not at all, it was no trouble. (polite, coworker)

Japanese avoids sounding like you are taking credit. A reply that says "it was nothing" is the polite move, so the reply is built around denying the favor, not accepting the thanks. That is also why an English-style "of course" is not the usual reply to thanks: もちろん answers questions and requests, and of course in Japanese points to いえいえ or とんでもないです instead.

Does the reply depend on how big the favor was?

No. It depends on your relationship with the person, not the size of the favor. You can carry someone's whole luggage and still answer a friend with a casual うん or いいよ, and you can hold a door for a stranger and answer with a polite いえいえ.

Think of three zones:

  • Close (friends, family): casual and short. 気きにしないで, いいよ, うん.
  • Neutral (coworkers, acquaintances): いえいえ, 大丈夫だいじょうぶです, こちらこそ.
  • Respect (boss, customer, elder): とんでもないです, とんでもございません, お役に立やくにたててよかったです.

For the full range of ways to thank people in the first place, see how to say thank you in Japanese.

Beyond the basics

What does とんでもないです mean, and when do you use it?

とんでもないです means "not at all, I couldn't possibly accept thanks for that." It is a humble way to push the thanks away, and it is the reply to use with a boss, a senior coworker, or a customer.

助たすかりました。ありがとうございます。— とんでもないです。 — You saved me. Thank you. — Not at all. (polite, to someone above you) いえいえ、とんでもないです。 — Oh no, really, it was nothing. (polite, a little extra humble)

In service settings you will hear とんでもございません, the stiffer business form. Some people argue that this exact form is a debated, "incorrect" keigo mix, but you will hear it all the time at hotels and shops, and it is understood everywhere. As a learner, とんでもないです is the safer choice.

Why can どういたしまして sound strange to a boss?

Because it can sound like you are accepting the thanks as if you really did them a large favor. Between people of different rank, the humble move is to deny the favor (とんでもないです), not to receive the gratitude. Saying どういたしまして to a boss can come across as slightly proud, or as if you were correcting them for thanking you.

資料しりょう、助たすかったよ。ありがとう。— とんでもないです。 — The materials really helped, thanks. — Not at all. (boss to you, your humble reply)

For the bigger picture of when to switch between polite and casual forms at work, see keigo vs casual Japanese: when to switch.

What do you say to a shop clerk who thanks you?

Nothing, or a light nod and どうも. This is the pattern that confuses learners most. In a store the clerk says ありがとうございます as part of the service. It is not a personal favor you need to answer, so you do not say "you're welcome." The customer's reply is a small nod, どうも, or ありがとうございます back.

ありがとうございました。— どうも。 — Thank you very much. — Thanks. (casual-neutral, customer leaving a shop) ありがとうございます。— ありがとうございます。 — Thank you. — Thank you. (customers who say it back are polite, not strange)

If you answer a clerk with どういたしまして, it sounds like you are the one providing the service.

How do you answer when the thanks goes both ways?

Use こちらこそ. It means "I should be the one thanking you" and is the natural reply when you both owe each other.

今日きょうはありがとうございました。— こちらこそ、ありがとうございました。 — Thank you for today. — Thank you too, really. (polite, after a meeting or a lesson) 一緒いっしょに来きてくれてありがとう。— こちらこそ! — Thanks for coming with me. — No, thank you! (casual, friends)

What are the casual replies for friends?

With friends, drop all the humility and use short, relaxed lines.

ありがとう!— 気きにしないで。 — Thanks! — Don't worry about it. (casual) 助たすかったよ、ありがとう。— いいよいいよ。 — You saved me, thanks. — It's fine, it's fine. (casual) また何なにかあったら、いつでも言いってね。 — If something comes up again, tell me anytime. (casual, warm offer) このくらい、お安やすい御用ごようだよ。 — That's nothing, an easy favor. (casual, a little playful, slightly old-fashioned)

全然ぜんぜん works too. 全然ぜんぜん大丈夫だいじょうぶ (it's totally fine) is very common, even though textbooks once said 全然ぜんぜん only goes with negatives. In modern speech 全然ぜんぜん + positive is everywhere.

How do anime characters brush off thanks?

In anime, the "you're welcome" is almost always a refusal to accept credit. In shounen anime you often hear a proud, tough character mumble something like these generic lines:

別べつに。 — It's nothing. (casual, cool and a bit brusque) 当然とうぜんだろ。 — Of course. Obviously. (casual, masculine tone, matter-of-fact) 気きにすんな。 — Don't sweat it. (casual, rough, 気きにするな relaxed)

These are all spoken-style shortcuts of the same idea: "no need to thank me." They are fine with close friends and rude to anyone above you. The first one, 別べつに, has its own range of tones, which you can explore in how to say "I don't care" in Japanese with 別べつに.

Is ようこそ the same as "you're welcome"?

No. This is a very common trap. ようこそ and いらっしゃいませ mean "welcome" as in welcoming someone who arrives, not "you're welcome" as a reply to thanks. Saying ようこそ after someone thanks you is like answering "thank you" with "welcome to my house." For the arrival side of the word, see welcome in Japanese: ようこそ and いらっしゃいませ.

Which reply to use: a quick table

Reply Politeness Who you say it to
どういたしまして Polite, stiff Strangers, children, in a class
いえいえ Polite-neutral Coworkers, acquaintances, most situations
いいえ / いえ Polite-neutral, short Same as いえいえ, a bit quicker
とんでもないです Polite, humble Boss, senior coworker, customer
とんでもございません Very polite, business Customers, in hotels and shops
こちらこそ Polite or casual Anyone, when thanks goes both ways
気きにしないで Casual Friends, family
いいよ / いいよいいよ Casual Friends, family
全然ぜんぜん大丈夫だいじょうぶ Casual-neutral Friends, peers
いつでも言いって Casual Friends, a warm offer
お安やすい御用ごよう Casual, playful Friends, family
どうも / (nod) Casual Shop clerks who say ありがとうございます

How to practise it

Next time you thank someone, notice what comes back. Listen for three things: whether it starts with いえ, whether it denies the favor, and whether it matches the relationship. In anime, count how often the answer is a brush-off instead of "you're welcome." Then pick one polite reply (いえいえ) and one casual reply (気きにしないで) and use only those two for a week. Two reliable replies beat ten half-remembered ones.

Common mistakes

  • Using どういたしまして with everyone. It is not wrong, but between adults who know each other it sounds stiff. Fix: use いえいえ as your default.
  • Using どういたしまして to a boss or senior person. It can sound like you are accepting credit for a big favor. Fix: とんでもないです.
  • Answering a shop clerk's ありがとうございます with どういたしまして. You are the customer, not the service provider. Fix: a nod, どうも, or ありがとうございます back.
  • Using ようこそ as "you're welcome." ようこそ means "welcome" to a place or event. Fix: いえいえ or こちらこそ.
  • Choosing the reply by the size of the favor. The relationship decides, not the favor. Fix: ask "who is this person to me?" first.
  • Using 気きにすんな with someone above you. It is a rough, casual line from anime and sounds rude at work. Fix: とんでもないです.

Practice

Build each answer before opening it. Questions 3 and 4 are a pair: the same thanks, answered to two different people.

1. A stranger thanks you for pointing out the station. Give the textbook polite reply.

Show answer

どういたしまして — it fits a short, one-time helping moment with a stranger, though いえいえ is more natural in real life.

2. What does いえいえ literally mean, and why is it used as a reply?

Show answer

"No, no" — you are waving the thanks away. Japanese prefers sounding modest, so the reply denies the favor instead of accepting the thanks.

3. Your close friend says 助たすかった、ありがとう. Give a casual reply.

Show answer

気きにしないで (or いいよ) — with a friend you can be short and relaxed, because the relationship is close.

4. Your boss says 助たすかりました、ありがとうございます. Give a humble polite reply.

Show answer

とんでもないです — it is humble and denies the favor. This is the pair to question 3: same thanks, but the relationship changes the reply.

5. Why can どういたしまして sound strange to a boss?

Show answer

It can sound like you are accepting credit for a big favor. Between people of different rank, the humble move is to deny the favor, not to receive the thanks.

6. A shop clerk says ありがとうございました as you leave. What do you say?

Show answer

Nothing, a nod, or どうも — the clerk's thanks is part of the service, so you do not answer "you're welcome."

7. You thank a coworker after a meeting, and they say ありがとうございました too. Reply using the "thanks goes both ways" phrase.

Show answer

こちらこそ — "I should be the one thanking you." It fits when both people owe each other.

8. Which anime-style line means "don't sweat it" and is too rough for your boss?

Show answer

気きにすんな — a casual, rough form of 気きにするな. It works for close friends, but it is rude to someone above you.

9. Someone says ありがとう and you answer ようこそ. What went wrong?

Show answer

ようこそ means "welcome" to a place, not "you're welcome." The right reply would be いえいえ or どういたしまして.

10. Does the size of the favor decide which reply you use?

Show answer

No — the relationship does. The same favor gets 気きにしないで from a friend and とんでもないです from a boss.

A trial lesson is a good place to answer a thank-you with いえいえ, とんでもないです or 気きにしないで instead of the stiff どういたしまして, choosing by who you are talking to.

FAQ

Is どういたしまして rude? No, it is polite, just stiff. It is fine with strangers, children, and in class, but between coworkers or friends it sounds distant, which is why いえいえ is more common.

How do I say "you're welcome" casually? Use 気きにしないで, いいよ, or いいよいいよ with friends, and 全然ぜんぜん大丈夫だいじょうぶ if you want to sound easygoing. You can also just say うん.

What do I say to a customer who thanks me? Use とんでもないです, or in a business setting とんでもございません. Add お役に立やくにたててよかったです ("I'm glad I could help") for a warmer, polite finish.

Do I have to say anything when a clerk thanks me? No. A small nod or どうも is enough. You can also say ありがとうございます back, which is polite and common.

Is 別べつに a way to say "you're welcome"? Yes, but only casually and with a cool, brusque tone, often heard in anime. 別べつに means "it's nothing," so it can work as a brush-off, but with the wrong tone it sounds cold.

Why do Japanese people say いいえ after being thanked? It is not "no" as in refusing. It is a modest way of saying "no need to thank me," which fits the cultural preference for not taking credit.

Vocabulary from this article

Tap the block to select all of it, then copy. In Anki: File → Import, note type Basic, separator Tab, and each line becomes one card.

どういたしまして	どういたしまして — you're welcome (stiff, textbook)
いえいえ	いえいえ — no, no; not at all
とんでもないです	とんでもないです — not at all (humble)
とんでもございません	とんでもございません — not at all (business, very polite)
気にしないで	きにしないで — don't worry about it
こちらこそ	こちらこそ — I should be the one thanking you
いつでも	いつでも — anytime
お安い御用	おやすいごよう — an easy favor, no big deal
全然	ぜんぜん — not at all; totally (casual)
別に	べつに — it's nothing; not particularly
当然	とうぜん — of course, naturally
どうも	どうも — thanks (casual)
助かる	たすかる — to be saved, to be helped
ようこそ	ようこそ — welcome (to a place)
いらっしゃいませ	いらっしゃいませ — welcome (shop greeting)

I'm Yuuki, a Japanese teacher based in Tokyo. I've taught on italki as a Top 1% teacher and watched over 1,500 anime, so most of the example sentences on this blog come from lines I've actually heard students ask about — including this one, which comes up in nearly every beginner's first few lessons. For practice with feedback, Book a trial lesson · $13, or work through Japanese practice exercises first.

Sources: the author's own lessons and standard reference grammars.

More drills like the ones above, plus a timed JLPT-style mock test: Practice · N5 · Read something at this level: JLPT N5 stories with audio

More “Talking to Real People” articles →

Want to try this in a real conversation?

30-minute trial lesson, $13. Times shown in your own timezone.

Practice it out loud with a Tokyo native. ★5.0 from 358 italki reviews.

See how the lessons work →

Book a trial lesson · $13