LESSON NOTES · レッスンノート

N3How you sound · Sep 14, 2026

Japanese idioms: 20 慣用句かんようく that actually come up in conversation

Japanese idioms cluster into two families you can learn as a set: expressions built from body parts (くちかたい, みみいたい, す) and expressions built around what other people see you do (後ろ指うしろゆびされる, ぬふり). Learn the body-part family for utility, and the social family for what it reveals about the culture.

Idioms are the point where a learner stops sounding like a textbook. They are also where learners most often overreach — dropping a proverb into a casual chat is like saying "a stitch in time saves nine" to a colleague at lunch.

The basics

慣用句かんようく, ことわざ and 熟語じゅくご are different things

Type What it is Example
慣用句かんようく Idiom — a fixed phrase with a figurative meaning
ことわざ Proverb — a saying with a lesson さるからちる
熟語じゅくご Four-character compound, often from Chinese 一石二鳥いっせきにちょう

This article is about 慣用句かんようく, because those are the ones that appear in ordinary conversation. Proverbs are for writing and for the occasional well-placed remark; four-character compounds live mostly in speeches and newspapers.

The body-part family

This is the largest group by far, and the meanings are usually guessable once you know the pattern.

Idiom Literal Means
くちかた mouth is hard can keep a secret
くちかる mouth is light can't keep a secret
かおひろ face is wide well connected
みみいた ears hurt that criticism hits home
あたまがる head lowers I have real respect for them
がない has no eyes has a weakness for
lend a hand help out
はら stomach stands up to get angry
ねこりたい want to borrow a cat's paws desperately short-handed
あし引っ張ひっぱ pull someone's leg hold the team back

彼女かのじょくちかたいから、はなしても大丈夫だいじょうぶですよ。 — She can keep a secret, so it's fine to tell her. (polite) あまいものにはがないんです。 — I have a real weakness for sweets. (polite — がない, not "blind")

Note that あし引っ張ひっぱる is a false friend: it does not mean "tease someone." It means holding others back, and it is a genuine criticism.

The social family

A second cluster is about being watched, and it says something about the culture it grew in:

Idiom Means
後ろ指うしろゆびされる to be talked about behind your back
ぬふりをする to turn a blind eye
まわりのにする to worry about what people think
羽目はめはず to let loose, go overboard
無礼講ぶれいこう an occasion where rank is set aside

後ろ指うしろゆびされるようなことはしていません。 — I've done nothing anyone could talk about behind my back. (polite — a defence) 今日きょう無礼講ぶれいこうで。 — Tonight, forget about rank. (said by the senior person at a drinking party)

無礼講ぶれいこう is worth knowing before your first work drinks. It is announced by the most senior person present, and it means the usual hierarchy is suspended — although how literally to take that varies enormously by company, which is its own lesson in when to switch registers.

Beyond the basics

Which Japanese proverbs are actually worth learning?

ことわざ are a separate category from the idioms above: a proverb carries a lesson, an idiom just carries a figurative meaning. There are thousands, most of them are archive material, and a small number are genuinely in use. These are the ones I hear from actual people:

Proverb Literally What it means
さるからちる Even monkeys fall from trees Everyone makes mistakes
七転しちてん八起やおき Fall seven times, get up eight Keep going after failure
喉元のどもとぎればあつさをわすれる Once it's down your throat you forget the heat People forget hardship once it's over
いしうえにも三年さんねん Three years even on a rock Persistence warms even cold ground
くいたれる The stake that sticks out gets hammered Standing out invites correction
ちりもればやまとなる Even dust piles into a mountain Small things accumulate
さとはいってはさとしたが Entering a village, follow the village When in Rome
はなより団子だんご Dumplings over flowers Substance over appearance
あんずるよりむがやさ Giving birth is easier than worrying about it The dread is worse than the thing
いそがばまわ If in a hurry, go around Haste makes waste

Two of these are worth extra attention. くいたれる is quoted constantly in discussions of Japanese society, usually critically, and it is often the first proverb a learner meets in an article rather than in life. はなより団子だんご is genuinely used in conversation and is a good one to have ready — it works any time someone chooses the practical option over the pretty one.

Proverbs shorten in use, the way English ones do. さるからちる often arrives as just さるから, and 七転しちてん八起やおきき appears on its own as an encouragement with no sentence around it.

Use them sparingly — one in a conversation is charming, three is a performance. A proverb from a learner lands well precisely because it is unexpected, and that effect does not survive repetition.

Idioms conjugate normally

They are ordinary grammar wearing figurative clothes:

してくれませんか。 — Could you give me a hand? (polite request — te-form + くれる)

はらった (got angry), みみいたいです (that stings), がなくて (having a weakness for, connecting). Nothing special is required — if you can conjugate the verb, you can use the idiom.

The ones that do not translate

Some idioms map cleanly onto English (す = lend a hand). Others do not, and those are the ones worth extra attention:

  • みみいた has no clean English equivalent. It is what you say when someone's criticism is fair and you know it — an admission, not a complaint.
  • あたまがる is respect specifically for someone's effort or perseverance, not for their status.
  • かおひろ is neutral to positive. English "well connected" can sound calculating; かおひろい does not.

Where to hear them

Idioms are dense in workplace conversation and in anime dialogue about relationships. They are rare in news and in service Japanese, which prefers plain phrasing. If your listening practice is all news, you will not meet these — the same gap that leaves learners without onomatopoeia, the other big informal vocabulary family.

A note on overreach

Idioms make you sound fluent when they fit and strange when they don't. Two rules that keep you safe:

  1. Use one you have actually heard in a real conversation, in the same situation.
  2. When in doubt, say the plain version. たすけてください always works; a mistimed ねこりたい does not.

Learners tend to collect idioms faster than they collect the situations to use them in — and the same trap catches wasei-eigo, where the words look easy and the usage isn't.

Common mistakes

  • Translating あし引っ張ひっぱる as "pull someone's leg." It means holding the group back and it is a real criticism.
  • Using がない to mean blind. It means having a weakness for something.
  • Taking 無礼講ぶれいこう completely literally. Rank is suspended in name; read the room.
  • Deploying proverbs in casual chat. One is charming, several is a performance.
  • Assuming みみいたい is a complaint. It is an admission that the criticism landed.

Practice

Answers are hidden — build yours first, then open. Questions 3 and 4 are a pair: the same body part, opposite meanings.

1. What does ねこりたい mean?

Show answer

Desperately short-handed — so busy you'd take help from a cat, which would be useless. The uselessness is the joke.

2. Say "could you give me a hand?" politely, using an idiom.

Show answer

してくれませんか — idioms conjugate normally: te-form plus くれる for a request.

3. What does くちかたい mean?

Show answer

Can keep a secret — a hard mouth does not open.

4. What does くちかるい mean?

Show answer

Cannot keep a secret — a light mouth opens easily. This is the pair to question 3: same body part, opposite adjective.

5. Someone criticises you and they are right. Which idiom?

Show answer

みみいたいです — it is an admission that the criticism landed, not a complaint about being criticised.

6. Something is wrong here: かれはいつもチームのあし引っ張ひっぱって、みんなをわらわせます。

Show answer

あし引っ張ひっぱる means holding the team back — it is a criticism, not teasing. The English "pull someone's leg" is a false friend.

7. Say "I have a real weakness for sweets."

Show answer

あまいものにはがないんですがない is a weakness for something, not blindness.

8. Your boss says 今日きょう無礼講ぶれいこうで at a work party. What has just happened?

Show answer

Rank has officially been set aside for the evening — announced by the most senior person. How literally to take it varies by company.

9. What does ぬふりをする mean, and which family does it belong to?

Show answer

To turn a blind eye — the social family — the idioms built around being seen, alongside 後ろ指うしろゆびされる and まわりのにする.

10. You need help and you are not sure an idiom fits. What do you say?

Show answer

たすけてください — the plain version always works. A mistimed idiom does not.

FAQ

How many idioms should I learn? Twenty well-chosen ones will cover most conversations. Depth beats breadth — knowing exactly when みみいたい fits is worth more than recognising fifty phrases.

Are idioms formal or casual? Most are register-neutral; politeness comes from the verb ending. していただけますか is perfectly formal.

Do young people still use these? The body-part ones, yes, constantly. Proverbs less so, and some four-character compounds sound dated in speech.

Is 大丈夫だいじょうぶ an idiom? No, it is ordinary vocabulary — though its range has expanded so far in recent years that it now covers "yes," "no," and "no thank you" depending on tone.

Where can I check whether an idiom fits? Look for it in the situation you want to use it in, not in a dictionary. Idioms are about context, and dictionaries only give you meaning.

Why so many body parts? Because emotions and social positions are felt physically, and older layers of the language named them that way. Japanese is not unusual here — English has "cold feet" and "a good head on your shoulders" — but the family is larger and more systematic.

Vocabulary from this article

Tap the block to select all of it, then copy. In Anki: File → Import, note type Basic, separator Tab — the first column becomes the front, the second the back.

慣用句	かんようく — idiom
口	くち — mouth
堅い	かたい — hard, firm
軽い	かるい — light
顔	かお — face
広い	ひろい — wide
耳	みみ — ear
痛い	いたい — painful
頭	あたま — head
下がる	さがる — to go down
目	め — eye
手	て — hand
貸す	かす — to lend
腹	はら — stomach, belly
立つ	たつ — to stand
猫	ねこ — cat
借りる	かりる — to borrow
足	あし — leg, foot
引っ張る	ひっぱる — to pull
後ろ指	うしろゆび — pointing behind someone's back
羽目	はめ — bounds, restraint
外す	はずす — to remove, to step outside
無礼講	ぶれいこう — a party with rank set aside
喉元	のどもと — throat
熱さ	あつさ — heat
忘れる	わすれる — to forget
甘い	あまい — sweet
助ける	たすける — to help, to rescue

I'm Yuuki, a Japanese teacher based in Tokyo. I've taught on italki as a Top 1% teacher and watched over 1,500 anime. The lessons learners remember longest are the ones where a handful of idioms land together — 無礼講ぶれいこう, 後ろ指うしろゆびす, 羽目はめはずす — because they are not vocabulary, they are a description of how a room works.

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Sources: the author's own lessons and standard reference grammars.

More drills like the ones above, plus a timed JLPT-style mock test: Practice · N3

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