LESSON NOTES · レッスンノート

N4Lesson notes · Oct 4, 2026

Death in Japanese: 死し (し), 亡なくなる, and why the number 4 is avoided

"Death" in Japanese is 死し (し, shi), and "to die" is 死しぬ (しぬ). When you talk about a real person, though, the polite word is 亡なくなる (なくなる), "to pass away". And because 死し is read し, the number four, also し, is avoided in some places.

This is a word where register matters more than usual. 死しぬ is a plain verb, fine for animals, stories, games and jokes like "I'm dying of hunger". Used about someone's grandmother, it sounds cold. Japanese has a gentler set of words for real loss, a few customs that every visitor should know, and a surprising amount of everyday slang built on the same kanji. This post covers all three, respectfully.

How do you say "death" in Japanese?

What are the basic words?

死し (し) is the noun "death", and 死しぬ (しぬ) is the verb "to die".

死しは誰だれにでも来くる。 — Death comes to everyone. (neutral, written or serious) 金魚きんぎょが死しんでしまった。 — My goldfish died. (casual, a pet)

死しぬ is a slightly unusual verb: it is the only common verb that ends in ぬ, so its forms are worth noticing: 死しんだ (died), 死しんでいる (is dead), 死しなない (will not die). Our post on the te-form covers how 死しぬ becomes 死しんで.

How do you say someone "passed away"?

Use 亡なくなる (なくなる). It is the polite, gentle way to say a person died, and it is what people normally use.

祖母そぼは去年きょねん亡なくなりました。 — My grandmother passed away last year. (polite, the normal way) お父様とうさまが亡なくなられたと聞ききました。 — I heard your father passed away. (very polite, about someone else's family)

The difference is real: 祖母そぼが死しんだ is grammatically correct, but it sounds blunt, almost cold. In conversation, news and letters, 亡なくなる is the natural choice. In formal writing you will also see 死去しきょ (しきょ), a neutral formal word, and 逝去せいきょ (せいきょ), a respectful word used for someone else's death (not your own family's), and news reports often use 死亡しぼう (しぼう) for accidents.

What do you say to someone who lost a loved one?

The standard phrase is お悔くやみ申し上もうしあげます (おくやみもうしあげます), "please accept my condolences".

心こころからお悔くやみ申し上もうしあげます。 — I offer my deepest condolences. (very polite, spoken or written) 大変たいへんでしたね。 — That must have been so hard. (polite, a gentle spoken comfort)

In conversation, short and quiet is better than long. A simple 大変たいへんでしたね with a bow says a lot. Avoid repeating words like 重かさね重かさね, "again and again", in condolences, since repetition is felt to invite more loss.

Beyond the basics

Why is the number 4 unlucky?

Because 四よ (four) can be read し, the same sound as 死し (death). For this reason, people usually read four as よん, and some hospitals and hotels avoid room number 4.

四よはよんと読よむことが多おおい。 — Four is usually read よん. (neutral)

Nine has a similar problem: 九きゅう can be く, the same sound as 苦く (suffering). So よん and きゅう are the safe readings. Our numbers guide explains when you will still hear し and く, such as in 四月しがつ (しがつ, April).

Which chopstick habits are linked to death?

Two table habits copy funeral customs, so they are strongly avoided.

  • Sticking chopsticks upright in rice. This echoes the bowl of rice offered to the dead.
  • Passing food from chopsticks to chopsticks. This echoes how bones are passed after a cremation.

ご飯はんに箸はしを立たてないでください。 — Please don't stand your chopsticks in your rice. (polite, a common reminder)

Nobody will think you are cursing them, but people will notice. Rest your chopsticks on a chopstick rest (箸はし置おき) or set them neatly beside your dish instead.

How is 死しぬ used as an exaggeration?

Just like English "I'm dying", 死しにそう and 死しぬほど exaggerate hunger, tiredness, laughter and love.

お腹おなかがすいて死しにそう。 — I'm starving to death. (casual, very common) 死しぬほど笑わらった。 — I laughed so hard I nearly died. (casual) このアニメ、死しぬほど好すき。 — I love this anime to death. (casual, fan talk)

These are everyday, light uses. They are fine with friends. The one to avoid is 死しね, the command form, "die!", which is a real insult, much stronger than in English internet slang.

What words are built on 死し?

Several useful ones have nothing to do with actual death.

Word Reading Meaning
必死ひっし ひっし desperate, with all your might
死角しかく しかく blind spot
死語しご しご outdated slang, "dead word"
死神しにがみ しにがみ god of death
死亡しぼう しぼう death (news, official)

必死ひっしに勉強べんきょうした。 — I studied like my life depended on it. (casual) その言葉ことばはもう死語しごだよ。 — That word is so outdated. (casual, teasing)

必死ひっし is the one to learn first. It is everywhere, from exam season to sports commentary, and it simply means giving everything. 死語しご is fun: telling a friend their slang is a 死語しご is a gentle way to say they sound old.

How does anime use 死し?

Constantly, in titles, battle lines and drama.

死しぬな! — Don't die! (rough, a desperate battlefield plea) 俺おれはまだ死しねない。 — I can't die yet. (rough male speech, a classic hero line)

デスノート (Death Note) uses the English word in its title, but its gods of death are 死神しにがみ. And 死しぬな, the negative command, is the opposite of 死しね: a plea for someone to live. The difference between them is one sound and a world of meaning. For the most famous death line in anime, see お前まえはもう死しんでいる.

How do Japanese families remember the dead?

Through a home altar, 仏壇ぶつだん (ぶつだん), and the summer festival お盆ぼん (おぼん), when ancestors' spirits are said to return home.

お盆ぼんに祖父そふの家いえへ帰かえります。 — I go back to my grandfather's house for Obon. (polite)

Many families place photos, flowers and small offerings at the 仏壇ぶつだん and talk to their ancestors in a quiet, ordinary way. For them, remembering the dead is a continuing part of daily life.

Common mistakes

  • Using 死しぬ about someone's family member. Say 亡なくなる.
  • Saying 死しね as a joke. It is a genuine insult. 死しぬほど and 死しにそう are the safe exaggerations.
  • Reading four as し in phone numbers or room numbers. Use よん.
  • Standing chopsticks in rice. Rest them on a chopstick rest or beside your dish.
  • Long, repeated condolences. Keep it short: お悔くやみ申し上もうしあげます or 大変たいへんでしたね.

Quick comparison

Word Reading Meaning Use
死し し death written, serious
死しぬ しぬ to die plain, animals, stories
亡なくなる なくなる to pass away polite, about people
死亡しぼう しぼう death news, official
お悔くやみ申し上もうしあげます おくやみもうしあげます my condolences very polite
死しぬほど しぬほど to death (exaggeration) casual
必死ひっし ひっし desperate, all-out everyday

Practice

Try each answer yourself before opening it. Questions 2 and 3 are a pair on register.

1. What is the verb "to die"?

Show answer

死しぬ (しぬ) — the only common verb ending in ぬ.

2. Your pet goldfish died. Say it casually.

Show answer

金魚きんぎょが死しんでしまった — 死しぬ is fine for animals.

3. Your grandmother passed away last year. Say it politely.

Show answer

祖母そぼは去年きょねん亡なくなりました — 亡なくなる is the gentle word for people. This is the pair to question 2.

4. What is the standard condolence phrase?

Show answer

お悔くやみ申し上もうしあげます — often with 心こころから in front.

5. Why is the number four often read よん?

Show answer

Because し sounds like 死し (death) — so よん is the safe reading.

6. Which table habit should you avoid because it echoes a funeral custom?

Show answer

Standing chopsticks upright in rice — or passing food from chopsticks to chopsticks.

7. Say "I'm starving to death" casually.

Show answer

お腹おなかがすいて死しにそう — a light, everyday exaggeration.

8. What does 必死ひっしに勉強べんきょうした mean?

Show answer

I studied desperately, with everything I had — 必死ひっし means all-out effort.

9. What is the difference between 死しね and 死しぬな?

Show answer

死しね is "die!", a real insult; 死しぬな is "don't die!", a plea to live — one sound, opposite meanings.

10. What do you call slang that has gone out of fashion?

Show answer

死語しご (しご) — a "dead word".

Practise the gentle words for a loss, 亡なくなる and お悔くやみ申し上もうしあげます, in a trial lesson so that 死しぬ is not what slips out.

FAQ

What is the kanji for death? 死し (し). It is often seen in words like 死亡しぼう and 必死ひっし.

Is 死し a good tattoo? It is a correct kanji, but most Japanese people would find it a dark, unlucky choice. Think carefully before wearing it.

What does 死神しにがみ mean? The god of death, or grim reaper. It appears in anime like デスノート and BLEACH.

Is 亡なくなる only for people? Mostly. For beloved pets, some people use 亡なくなる too, out of affection, but 死しぬ is normal for animals.

Why is 9 also unlucky? 九きゅう can be read く, the same sound as 苦く, "suffering". People usually say きゅう instead.

What should I say at a Japanese funeral? Keep it brief and quiet. このたびはご愁傷様しゅうしょうさまでございます is a common formal phrase, but a bow and お悔くやみ申し上もうしあげます is also correct. Do not say 御愁傷様ごしゅうしょうさま on its own in casual talk, where it can sound sarcastic.

Vocabulary from this article

Tap the block to select all of it, then copy. In Anki: File → Import, note type Basic, separator Tab — the first column becomes the front, the second the back.

死	し — death
死ぬ	しぬ — to die
亡くなる	なくなる — to pass away
死亡	しぼう — death (news, official)
お悔やみ申し上げます	おくやみもうしあげます — my condolences
ご愁傷様	ごしゅうしょうさま — my sympathies (formal)
必死	ひっし — desperate, all-out
死角	しかく — blind spot
死語	しご — outdated slang
死神	しにがみ — god of death
死ぬほど	しぬほど — to death (exaggeration)
仏壇	ぶつだん — household Buddhist altar
お盆	おぼん — summer festival for ancestors
金魚	きんぎょ — goldfish
箸	はし — chopsticks
祖母	そぼ — (my) grandmother

I'm Yuuki, a Japanese teacher based in Tokyo. I've taught on italki as a Top 1% teacher and watched over 1,500 anime, so most of the example sentences on this blog come from lines I've actually heard students ask about. Learners often know 死しぬ from anime long before they know 亡なくなる, and the gap between the two is worth closing early. For practice with feedback, Book a trial lesson · $13, or work through Japanese practice exercises first.

Sources: the author's own lessons and standard Japanese dictionaries.

More drills like the ones above, plus a timed JLPT-style mock test: Practice · N4 · Read something at this level: JLPT N4 stories with audio

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