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N4Lesson notes · Oct 4, 2026

Respect in Japanese: 尊敬そんけい vs 尊重そんちょう, and the "respect" you show with words

"Respect" in Japanese is usually 尊敬そんけい (そんけい) when you look up to a person: 父ちちを尊敬そんけいしています, "I respect my father". When you respect someone's opinion, choice or rights, the word is 尊重そんちょう (そんちょう): 意見いけんを尊重そんちょうします, "I respect your opinion".

English "respect" covers two different ideas, and Japanese gives each its own word. One is admiration: you look up to someone and want to be like them. The other is consideration: you treat someone's wishes as important, even if you do not admire them at all. Learners mix these up all the time, and the result can sound oddly emotional or oddly cold. This post untangles 尊敬そんけい and 尊重そんちょう first, then adds the rest of the family, from formal 敬意けいい to the anime threat 舐なめるな.

What is the difference between 尊敬そんけい and 尊重そんちょう?

What does 尊敬そんけい mean?

尊敬そんけい (そんけい) means respect in the sense of admiration: you look up to someone. The verb is 尊敬そんけいする, and because it describes an ongoing feeling, you usually use the ている form: 尊敬そんけいしています.

私わたしは母ははを尊敬そんけいしています。 — I respect my mother. (polite, admiration for a person) 尊敬そんけいする人ひとは誰だれですか? — Who is someone you respect? (polite, a classic interview and school question)

The second sentence is worth memorizing. 尊敬そんけいする人ひと ("a person I respect") is a standard question in Japanese job interviews, school essays and magazine interviews, and the expected answer is someone you admire, with a reason.

What does 尊重そんちょう mean?

尊重そんちょう (そんちょう) means to respect something as important: an opinion, a decision, a right, someone's privacy. It is about how you treat something, not about how much you admire it.

あなたの意見いけんを尊重そんちょうします。 — I respect your opinion. (polite, even if I disagree) 子供こどもの気持きもちを尊重そんちょうすることが大切たいせつです。 — It's important to respect children's feelings. (polite, a general principle)

You can 尊重そんちょう the opinion of someone you do not admire at all. That is the whole point of the word: it is respect as fairness, not as admiration.

How do you choose between them?

Ask what the object is. A person you look up to: 尊敬そんけい. Their opinion, choice, wishes or rights: 尊重そんちょう.

先生せんせいを尊敬そんけいしています。 — I respect my teacher. (admiration for the person) 先生せんせいの考かんがえを尊重そんちょうします。 — I respect my teacher's way of thinking. (I will treat it as important)

If you say 意見いけんを尊敬そんけいします, it sounds like you are in awe of the opinion itself, which is strange. If you say 父ちちを尊重そんちょうします, it sounds like you are politely tolerating your father, which is colder than you probably mean.

Word Reading Respect as... Typical object
尊敬そんけい そんけい admiration, looking up to a person
尊重そんちょう そんちょう treating as important opinions, choices, rights
敬意けいい けいい formal respect, regard 〜に敬意けいいを払はらう
憧あこがれ あこがれ admiration plus longing a person, a lifestyle
リスペクト — casual "respect" artists, creators

Beyond the basics

What is 敬意けいい?

敬意けいい (けいい) is a formal noun for respect or regard, usually in the phrase 敬意けいいを払はらう (けいいをはらう), "to pay respect". You will meet it in speeches, news and polite writing.

選手せんしゅたちに敬意けいいを払はらいましょう。 — Let's show respect to the players. (polite, formal speech) 相手あいての文化ぶんかに敬意けいいを持もつことが大切たいせつだ。 — It's important to have respect for other cultures. (written style)

The 敬たかし in 敬意けいい is the same kanji as in 敬語けいご (けいご), "respect language". In Japanese, a lot of respect is shown through grammar rather than through the word "respect". If you want that side, see keigo vs casual Japanese.

What is 憧あこがれ?

憧あこがれ (あこがれ) is admiration mixed with longing: you look up to someone and wish you could be like them, or be near them. The verb is 憧あこがれる, and the person takes に.

子供こどものころから、宇宙飛行士うちゅうひこうしに憧あこがれていました。 — Since I was a child, I've looked up to astronauts. (polite, a dream) 憧あこがれの先輩せんぱいと話はなせた! — I got to talk to the senior I admire! (casual, excited)

憧あこがれ is warmer and more emotional than 尊敬そんけい. You 尊敬そんけい a hardworking parent. You 憧あこがれる a star athlete or a cool upperclassman. In school anime, 憧あこがれの先輩せんぱい is a whole character type; see senpai and kouhai for how that relationship works.

Do Japanese people say リスペクト?

Yes. リスペクト is common in casual speech, especially about musicians, artists and creators. It sounds lighter and cooler than 尊敬そんけい, and it often means "I'm influenced by" as well as "I admire".

このバンドをすごくリスペクトしてる。 — I really respect this band. (casual, a fan or musician talking) 原作げんさくへのリスペクトを感かんじる。 — You can feel the respect for the original work. (casual, praising an adaptation)

The second sentence is a very common phrase in anime and film reviews: an adaptation with 原作げんさくへのリスペクト treats the source material with care.

How does disrespect sound in anime?

The classic line is 舐なめるな (なめるな), "Don't underestimate me" or "Don't look down on me". 舐なめる literally means "to lick", and by extension "to treat lightly".

俺おれを舐なめるな! — Don't underestimate me! (rough, a battle anime staple) 人ひとを見下みくだすような態度たいどはやめなさい。 — Stop acting like you look down on people. (firm, a scolding)

見下みくだす (みくだす) is the more neutral word for "to look down on". In real life, 舐なめてる? ("are you messing with me?") is a confrontational question, so it stays in anime and arguments.

And 尊とうとい?

In fan slang, 尊とうとい (とうとい) means something is so precious you cannot handle it. It shares the 尊みこと kanji with 尊敬そんけい and 尊重そんちょう, and the old meaning is "noble, sacred". Fans use it as an exclamation; see otaku slang for how it works.

Common mistakes

  • Saying 意見いけんを尊敬そんけいします. Opinions are 尊重そんちょう, not 尊敬そんけい. Say 意見いけんを尊重そんちょうします.
  • Saying 父ちちを尊重そんちょうしています when you mean admiration. It sounds like polite tolerance. Use 尊敬そんけいしています.
  • Using に with 尊敬そんけい. It is 〜を尊敬そんけいする. に goes with 憧あこがれる: 〜に憧あこがれる.
  • Using リスペクト in a formal speech. It is casual. Use 尊敬そんけい or 敬意けいい in formal settings.
  • Shouting 舐なめるな in real life. It is a fight line, not everyday Japanese.

Practice

Try each answer before opening it. Questions 3 and 4 are a pair: same idea of "respect", different object.

1. Say "I respect my mother."

Show answer

母ははを尊敬そんけいしています。 — admiration for a person is 尊敬そんけい, and the ongoing feeling uses ている.

2. In an interview you are asked 尊敬そんけいする人ひとは誰だれですか. What are they asking?

Show answer

"Who is someone you respect (look up to)?" — answer with a person you admire and a reason.

3. Say "I respect your opinion" (even if I disagree).

Show answer

あなたの意見いけんを尊重そんちょうします。 — opinions are treated as important, so the word is 尊重そんちょう.

4. Say "I respect my teacher" in the sense of looking up to them.

Show answer

先生せんせいを尊敬そんけいしています。 — a person you admire takes 尊敬そんけい. This is the pair to question 3.

5. Fill in the particle: 宇宙飛行士うちゅうひこうし ___ 憧あこがれていました。

Show answer

に — 憧あこがれる takes に for the person or thing you long to be like.

6. In a formal speech, say "Let's show respect to the players."

Show answer

選手せんしゅたちに敬意けいいを払はらいましょう。 — 敬意けいいを払はらう is the formal "pay respect".

7. A review says the anime has 原作げんさくへのリスペクト. What does that mean?

Show answer

It respects the original work. — the adaptation treats the source material with care. リスペクト is casual.

8. In a battle anime, a character shouts 舐なめるな. What do they mean?

Show answer

"Don't underestimate me!" — 舐なめる literally means to lick, and here means to treat someone lightly.

9. Which word is warmer and includes longing: 尊敬そんけい or 憧あこがれ?

Show answer

憧あこがれ — it is admiration plus the wish to be like, or near, that person.

10. Fix the sentence: 子供こどもの気持きもちを尊敬そんけいすることが大切たいせつです。

Show answer

子供こどもの気持きもちを尊重そんちょうすることが大切たいせつです。 — feelings are something you treat as important, so the word is 尊重そんちょう.

In a trial lesson, say who you 尊敬そんけいする and whose opinion you 尊重そんちょうする, and notice that the two verbs aim at different things.

FAQ

What is the most common word for "respect" in Japanese? For people, 尊敬そんけい (そんけい). For opinions, choices and rights, 尊重そんちょう (そんちょう).

How do you say "I respect you" in Japanese? あなたを尊敬そんけいしています. In real conversation, Japanese speakers often say it more indirectly, for example 本当ほんとうにすごいと思おもいます, "I really think you're amazing".

Is リスペクト rude or wrong? Neither. It is casual and common, especially for artists and creators. Just avoid it in formal speeches and writing.

What is the difference between 尊敬そんけい and 敬意けいい? 尊敬そんけい is the feeling of looking up to someone. 敬意けいい is a formal word for respect or regard, often in 敬意けいいを払はらう, "to pay respect".

Is 敬語けいご the same as respect? 敬語けいご is "respect language", the grammar Japanese uses to show respect. It is how respect is expressed, not the feeling itself.

What does 尊とうとい mean in fandom? "Precious beyond words", an exclamation for something too good to handle. The original meaning is "noble, sacred".

Vocabulary from this article

Tap the block to select all of it, then copy. In Anki: File → Import, note type Basic, separator Tab — the first column becomes the front, the second the back.

尊敬	そんけい — respect, admiration
尊敬する	そんけいする — to respect, look up to
尊重	そんちょう — respect, regard as important
尊重する	そんちょうする — to respect (opinions, choices)
意見	いけん — opinion
敬意	けいい — respect, regard (formal)
敬意を払う	けいいをはらう — to pay respect
敬語	けいご — respect language
憧れ	あこがれ — admiration, longing
憧れる	あこがれる — to look up to, long to be like
リスペクト	リスペクト — respect (casual)
原作	げんさく — original work
舐める	なめる — to lick; to underestimate
見下す	みくだす — to look down on
尊い	とうとい — precious, noble
宇宙飛行士	うちゅうひこうし — astronaut

I'm Yuuki, a Japanese teacher based in Tokyo. I've taught on italki as a Top 1% teacher and watched over 1,500 anime. The 尊敬そんけい and 尊重そんちょう pair is one I have untangled with learners more than once, usually when someone wants to say they respect a person's decision and reaches for the wrong one. For practice with feedback, Book a trial lesson · $13, or try the Japanese practice exercises first.

Sources: the author's own lessons and standard reference dictionaries.

More drills like the ones above, plus a timed JLPT-style mock test: Practice · N4 · Read something at this level: JLPT N4 stories with audio

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