LESSON NOTES · レッスンノート

N5Grammar, one piece at a time · Sep 13, 2026

これ, それ, あれ, どれ: the こそあど grid and how to read it

Japanese demonstratives are not "this / that / that over there" — they are a map of who the thing belongs to. こ is near me, そ is near you, あ is away from both of us, and ど asks. Once you see it as a grid, twenty words collapse into five rows and four columns.

This is one of the few places where Japanese is more systematic than English, and learners usually meet it as twenty separate vocabulary items instead of one pattern. The pattern is called こそあど, after the four initial sounds.

The basics

The grid

こ (near me) そ (near you) あ (away from both) ど (question)
Thing これ それ あれ どれ
+ noun このほん そのほん あのほん どのほん
Place ここ そこ あそこ どこ
Direction / polite こちら そちら あちら どちら
Manner こう そう ああ どう
Kind of こんな そんな あんな どんな

Every row follows the same four-way split. Learn the columns once and the whole table is yours.

これはなんですか。 — What is this? (I'm holding it — and how to ask what a word means is a different question entirely) それはいくらですか。 — How much is that? (it's near you) あれはなんですか。 — What's that over there? (far from both of us)

これ vs この — the error everyone makes

これ is a noun: it stands alone and means "this thing." この is a modifier: it must be followed by a noun.

✗ これほん面白おもしろいです。 。○ このほん面白おもしろいです。 — This book is interesting. ○ これは面白おもしろいです。 — This is interesting.

Same for それ/その, あれ/あの, どれ/どの. If a noun follows, use the の form. If nothing follows, use the れ form. There are no exceptions.

そ is the listener's territory

This is the part English does not have. そ does not mean "medium distance" — it means "yours, or the thing you just mentioned."

そのほんしてください。 — Lend me that book. (the one you're holding)

It also covers anything the other person brought up that you have no direct knowledge of:

A: 昨日きのうあたらしいみせきました。 — I went to a new restaurant yesterday. B: そうですか。そのみせはどこですか。 — Oh really? Where is that restaurant? (you mentioned it, so それ/その)

Using あの there would be wrong, because あ implies you both know it.

Beyond the basics

あ is for shared memory

あ is not only about physical distance. It also marks something both speakers already know — outside the conversation, in your common past.

あのみせおぼえてる? — Remember that restaurant? (we both went) あのひと元気げんきかな。 — I wonder how that person is doing. (we both know who)

This is the difference that decides そ vs あ in conversation about things nobody can see. If only one of you knows it, そ. If you both do, あ. Getting this right is one of the quiet markers of Japanese that sounds natural rather than assembled.

あの as a filler is a different word

あの at the start of a sentence, with a pause, is not pointing at anything. It is the Japanese "um" — used to get someone's attention or buy a second.

あのう、すみません。 — Um, excuse me. あの、ちょっといいですか。 — Er, do you have a moment?

You can tell them apart instantly: filler あの stands alone and is often stretched to あのう; the demonstrative あの is glued to a noun.

こちら: the polite column

The こちら row does double duty. Literally it means direction, but it is also the polite version of both これ and ここ, and どちら is the polite どこ and the polite だれ.

こちらへどうぞ。 — This way, please. こちらはいかがですか。 — How about this one? (polite, shop staff) どちらからましたか。 — Where are you from? (polite version of どこから) どちらさまですか。 — Who is this, please? (polite だれ — on the phone or at a door)

Shop and hotel staff use this row constantly. こちらこそ ("likewise," literally "this side, precisely") is another fixed phrase from it, and the standard reply to ありがとうございました or よろしくおねがいします.

そう is everywhere because こう/そう/ああ is a row

The manner row explains a word you already use constantly.

そうです。 — That's right. (literally: it is that way) そうですね。 — Let me see. / You're right. どうおもいますか。 — What do you think? (how do you think?) こうやって、します。 — You press it like this. (demonstrating)

Note this そう is unrelated to the 〜そう of "looks like" and "I heard". Same sound, different word — the demonstrative そう is a pointer, not an ending.

こんな/そんな/あんな — "this kind of"

The last row is about type rather than identity, and それ vs そんな is worth keeping apart.

そんなことわないで。 — Don't say that kind of thing. こんなみせはじめて。 — I've never been to a place like this. どんな音楽おんがくきですか。 — What kind of music do you like?

そんな in particular carries emotion. そんなこと… trailing off is a whole reaction on its own — closer to "don't say things like that" than a neutral description.

How does it sound in anime?

The そ and あ rows carry a lot of dialogue, mostly in short reactions:

そうか。 — I see. (casual) そんなこと… — Something like that…? (trailing off in disbelief) あいつか。 — That guy, huh. (あいつ — the rough あのひと)

あいつ, こいつ, そいつ are the rough versions of あのひと and friends. They are extremely common in anime and genuinely rude in real conversation, so recognise them and keep them out of your own speech.

Common mistakes

  • これほん. これ stands alone; この needs a noun. これはほんです or このほんは…
  • Using あの for something only you know. If the other person doesn't know it, あ is wrong — use そ if they mentioned it, or introduce it first.
  • Using それ for something you're both looking at across the room. If it is far from both of you, that is あれ.
  • Treating こちら as only "this direction." It is the polite これ and ここ too, which is why shop staff say it constantly.
  • Mixing up あの and あのう. Glued to a noun it points; standing alone with a pause it is "um."
  • Using あいつ/こいつ. They are the rough forms and are genuinely impolite. あのひと is the neutral choice.

Practice

Answers are hidden — build yours first, then open. Questions 1 and 2 are a pair: the same word, and whether a noun follows decides the form.

1. Something is wrong here: これほん面白おもしろいです。

Show answer

このほん面白おもしろいです — これ stands alone as a noun; この must be followed by a noun. Same split for それ/その and あれ/あの.

2. Say "this is interesting" with no noun.

Show answer

これは面白おもしろいです — with nothing following, use the れ form. This is the pair to question 1: one rule, two shapes.

3. Someone is holding a book you want to borrow. Which word for "that book"?

Show answer

そのほん — そ is the listener's territory. そのほんしてください.

4. A friend mentions a restaurant you have never been to. How do you refer to it?

Show answer

そのみせ — they brought it up and you have no direct knowledge of it, so そ. あのみせ would claim you both know it.

5. You and a friend both went to a restaurant years ago. How do you refer to it?

Show answer

あのみせ — あ marks shared memory, not just physical distance. あのみせおぼえてる?

6. Make どこからましたか polite.

Show answer

どちらからましたか — the こちら row is the polite column. どちら is the polite どこ, and also the polite だれ in どちらさまですか.

7. What is あのう in あのう、すみません doing?

Show answer

It's a filler, not a demonstrative — standing alone and stretched, it means "um." The demonstrative あの is always glued to a noun.

8. Say "you press it like this" while demonstrating.

Show answer

こうやって、します — こう is the manner row: "in this way." Its partners are そう, ああ and どう.

9. What is the difference between そのこと and そんなこと?

Show answer

Identity vs type — そのこと is "that matter" (a specific one). そんなこと is "that kind of thing," and usually carries feeling: そんなことわないで.

10. Why should you avoid saying あいつ?

Show answer

It's the rough form of あのひと — common in anime, genuinely rude in conversation. Recognise it; say あのひと.

FAQ

Is そ really about the listener and not distance? Mostly, yes. For physical objects it usually works out the same, because things near your listener are a few steps from you. But for things nobody can see — a restaurant, a person, an idea — そ means "yours / the one you raised," and distance has nothing to do with it.

When do I use こちら instead of これ? In service situations and formal speech: shop staff, hotels, business. It is also what you use to introduce someone — こちらは田中たなかさんです ("this is Tanaka") — where これ would be insulting, since これ is for objects.

What about the 〜ら plural forms? これら, それら, あれら exist and mean "these, those," but they are written and stiff. In speech Japanese usually leaves number unmarked: これ covers both "this" and "these" with no change.

Is どちら really the polite だれ? In the fixed phrase どちらさまですか, yes — it is the standard way to ask who someone is on the phone or at the door. Asking だれですか directly in that situation sounds blunt.

What is こそあど as a term? It is just the four initial sounds used as a name for the system: こ・そ・あ・ど. Japanese grammar books use it the way English books say "wh-words," and knowing the term makes it much easier to look things up.

Why do shop staff say こちらこそ? It is a fixed phrase meaning "no, it's I who should thank you" — literally "this side, precisely." It is the standard reply to thanks or to よろしくおねがいします, and one of the highest-value set phrases for a beginner.

Vocabulary from this article

Tap the block to select all of it, then copy. In Anki: File → Import, note type Basic, separator Tab — the first column becomes the front, the second the back.

これ	これ — this (thing, near me)
それ	それ — that (thing, near you)
あれ	あれ — that (thing, over there)
どれ	どれ — which one
ここ	ここ — here
そこ	そこ — there
あそこ	あそこ — over there
どこ	どこ — where
こちら	こちら — this way; this one (polite)
どちら	どちら — which way; where (polite); who (polite)
こんな	こんな — this kind of
そんな	そんな — that kind of
どんな	どんな — what kind of
本	ほん — book
店	みせ — shop, restaurant
面白い	おもしろい — interesting
貸す	かす — to lend
覚える	おぼえる — to remember
押す	おす — to press
音楽	おんがく — music
初めて	はじめて — for the first time
元気	げんき — well, healthy

I'm Yuuki, a Japanese teacher based in Tokyo. I've taught on italki as a Top 1% teacher and watched over 1,500 anime. Learners arrive holding twenty words and leave holding one grid — and the part that keeps paying off long after N5 is そ versus あ for things nobody can see, which is what makes a conversation sound like two people who share a past.

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Sources: the author's own lessons and standard reference grammars.

More drills like the ones above, plus a timed JLPT-style mock test: Practice · N5

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